What holds me back? What walls remain?
What fears or loves or sins constrain?
Why can’t the self give full consent
To Jesus’ call to fully repent?
To go to Christ is all I want,
To plunge into his baptismal font,
To die and lay in the Lord’s own grave,
To know the power of God to save.
With unknown tentacles Satan clings,
To me are tied consuming strings;
From such a world can I extract?
Where’s courage so that I can act?
New birth and life are my desire,
A higher goal, eternal fire;
What worth this jewel! How high the price!
How bitter his cup of sacrifice!
Dare I on this way embark,
Where feet get tired, and days grow dark?
Where weary hearts and fearful minds
Lift heavy burdens in stormy winds?
Must holy travel be like this?
The weak denial, the betrayer’s kiss?
Of faithful service can I be sure?
Can I resist temptation’s lure?
Never will doubts be fully solved,
While I still waver, uninvolved;
Remains for me, without delay,
To trust the Lord and now obey.
I will! I will! To God I go
By grace and faith; enough I know
To launch upon his mercy and might,
To win with him this heavenly fight.