Chicago: The Audacity of Hope, II

An 18-year-old would-be thief tried to rob a Chicago muffler shop, according to a March 26 AP story.

Employees told him the safe wasn’t open, so he told them to call him when their boss returned with the combination.

“He gave us his phone number when we told him we didn’t have any money. He told us to call him back when the owner came back with the money and he was going to come back and rob him,” said worker Tony Diaz. “It’s pretty funny now, but it wasn’t at the time.”

The prospective thief eventually got a call, but so did Chicago police. The man returned around noon, wearing the same mask and clothing.

The police officers shot and wounded him in the leg. He was charged with attempted armed robbery and aggravated assault of a police officer.

“No one could make this up,” said police Lt. Scott Schwieger.

J. Randal Matheny

Be pithy.

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